What A Time

What a time to be alive? Presumably, pandemics occur approximately once every 100 years and I've been so fortunate to have been alive during this one. It's been an interesting ride and ultimately I have decided that I would like to be long gone before the next one happens. Assuming I won't still be on this plot of ground when I'm 126 years old, I should be fine. 

I felt conflicted when I learned that one of my coworkers tested positive for the virus. We have been around each other in the last week and I felt it was my responsibility to get tested as well because I have been experiencing some of the symptoms. So today I went to a "drive thru" testing at a local church and stood in a line for 45 minutes with Winston before I was able to get registered. Granted I did show up early so it didn't take that long once they were actually open for business. The bad thing? The sky fell down on us right when I got to the front of the line. I refused to leave and come back so I just stood there, patiently, waiting for my name to be called, "Victoria?" Yep, that's me! I couldn't tell who was more excited to make some movement; me or Winston. Poor guy was blinking his little eyelids so fast as the rain hit his face. I tried to use my only shield from the rain (my jacket) for him but he didn't seem to understand why I was covering part of his body and face with it. When I finally made it to the tent I had the honor of putting a stick up my nose all the way to my brain. Not literally. It really wasn't as bad as made seen on the web but you wouldn't hear me complaining if I never had to do it again. Small note... I ended up getting tested again two weeks later. It went smoothly the second time and both times I was negative! Whoo! 

Family Time

Family 

I recently realized how little I know about my family. That sounds bad but can you honestly say you know the nitty gritty details about you'r grandparents and great grandparents? I don't but I have a huge desire to know more. I catch myself fantasizing about what it was like for my family members back in the day and obviously hope that they were as good of people as my imagination has made them out to be; fighting for justice and being living proof of the American dream, but in reality I know very little. So here's what I'm hoping to accomplish this year. I want to know my family's stories and I want to share their stories as best I can. This year, 2020, I want to have deeper conversations with them. I want to learn about what made them who they are, what their fears were, their greatest adventures, times of adversity, and their favorite accomplishment thus far. I'm fine talking about the great times along with the bad and I'm hoping they can share with me all that they know and have experienced. This is my project and I'm extremely excited to be on it with my parents and grandparents! 

 Mindfulness 

Noun.  

1. 2. 

   a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

   
   

   
   

   This morning I woke with the intention of following my daily routine. Wake, walk Winston, exercise, eat and then mozy around until I have work this evening. Suddenly when my routine was interrupted by the rain I decided to sit and listen to my peaceful car jams playlist; eyes closed, still and in silence. I've had a tendency in the recent past to complain about low energy. The truth of the matter is, I have a lot of energy. If I am able to use up that energy I feel better. When I have to sit for hours and am unable to use it I feel as if it's shaking inside my body, like a panic attack, which in-turn makes me tired. For this reason sitting still has been a difficult task for me. However this morning brought me peace and a new goal for this week; practicing mindfulness. I'm not at the point where I can practice stillness for long durations of time (even 10 minutes). Personally I think that comes with mindfulness. So this week I plan to take time to look at what I'm eating and appreciate the nutrients I'm taking in, being present with my friends and absorbing all the laughs and when working out  sometimes choosing the less strenuous workouts and focusing on the small challenges it presents.

    I don't feel my lifestyle is wrong or unhealthy. Being active is my favorite thing to do and brings me joy but I want to be able to sit and feel peace. I would like to be able to do a yoga class without wanting to scream at the instructor to speed it up. Just to be clear I've never done that. Some try to speed up life and others want to slow it down. I would like to say I'm the latter but it's very clear to me that I tend to focus more on the future and the opportunities that could come rather than the ones that are in front of me. As a result I tend to do activities that make the day feel as if it's going by faster. It can sometimes be difficult for a highly goal oriented person to focus on the present moment but I think the most successful people are those who can find the balance between what they want and finding appreciation in what is right there in front of them. How can we get where we want without knowing now who we are, where we stand, and what we're capable of at the present moment?